Am I Happy??

Maybe I expect more than what I deserve...well...I know who I am {my status update tru FB}...i guess it shows how i felt right now....

I have so many reasons to be happy....so....

I should be happy right now...I had past my SPP interview (which I had waited for it for ages)...I am on my way to be a 'TEACHER'....I should smile...should tell the world how happy..how glad I am...but I don't know..I just feel it for a while...I told everyone...but it seems like only me that happy with it...ok fine... I'm ok.....


I should be happy...because..less than 4 month...me n him will move to another stage of our relationship....I google'ing' for everything...dreaming something great..something perfect...but what happen now....I'm so down....he is not as excited as me...I guess I'm not that special..but...its fine...I'm ok.... T_T

I'm lying...It's so hurting me inside.... I'm happy..but I'm not.....I'm waiting for the happiness to be mine....

I'm depressed T_T

I admit...at the moment..I'm so depressed..
Have no place..have nobody to tell what I feel...have nobody that understand me...that can tell me what I need to do...I need a guide...I need someone to guide me...to tell me that I need to do this and that...I'm so tired doing everything by myself...I'm so tired thinking about the thing that I'm not sure about it...I'm tired waiting..I'm tired of thinking...I'm tired of just seeing what others do what others have what others plan to do...me????nothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




I know that I need to do something...but I don't even know where to start...I guess I need help but who??? who can help me?????



What give me more stress....my only phone...disfunction again...ok again...fine....


I have no more reasons to feel happy right now... FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!